Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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