Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
