i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
