Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize