i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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