hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Randomize
