Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
