is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
