rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
