This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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