Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Randomize
