What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
