need another drink. this is the easiest way
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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