The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
