I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize