I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
