problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
