Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Randomize