I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Randomize