you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Of course I have a pirate flag
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
