Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
