he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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