She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
