We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
