Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Blood and glitter go together right?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Randomize
