"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
