Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
