Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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