why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
