Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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