I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
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