i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
