Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
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