I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
so explain again why im purple
no
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize