She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
