Got a toothbrush?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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