i don't like sucking hair
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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