Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
