My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
