No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
