I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
