Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
