how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
