so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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