I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Randomize
