he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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