I could have mohawked her pubes.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
