Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
