belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize
