yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize
