Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
